I am so proud of my husband. Not only did he do an outstanding job emceeing the police department’s awards ceremony today, but he also earned an Award of Valor “In honor of your courage, extreme bravery, and commitment to your duties as a law enforcement officer when confronted by an armed assailant;” a Chief’s Commendation “In recognition of your commitment, dedication, and outstanding managerial effectiveness;” and a Unit Citation. He is truly one of the good guys, through and through. He stands for what is right, fights against wrongs, and sets an example among those who work for him and alongside him. <3
Adapting
We ventured back down to D.C. on our last day at the NIH. We were taking it easy, as Ben was having some discomfort and headache from his lumbar puncture the day before. We took the Metro down to the Smithsonian and poked around the Museum of American History. (Note to self: next time, eat lunch from the streetcart outside the museum. Two chicken and fries, one slice of pizza, one salad, and four drinks = $55 in the museum. Yikes!!)
We did stop for ice cream from the cart afterward.
Greensboro lunch counter. I was working the news desk at the Fayetteville Observer-Times in 1993 when the Greensboro Woolworth’s store closed and the Smithsonian acquired this counter. I was really interested in the story then. But it’s always been just a story to me – the whole civil rights movement – having been born after the most intense years of the movement. I’ve tried to educate my kids about the history of desegregation in our country, but they always seem to look at me with blank stares. They have nothing in their life experience to hang the information on. Honestly, neither do I. But seeing the counter and participating in a kind of reenactment there at the museum stirred something deep inside me. I hope it did the same for my kids.
Top hat worn by Lincoln to Ford’s Theater the night of his assassination. Whoah.
George Washington’s field telescope and writing case that he used during the Revolutionary War. Seriously!
Ulysses S. Grant’s carriage. Oh my word. This is so much better than a history book!
Smithsonian Castle and gardens
Back at the NIH. Not a great pic, but it was the only chance I had to get one of Ben in front of the nicer NIH building for our Wall. We flew home late that night. Ben suffered from a headache for a few days, but it finally went away yesterday. We’re waiting to hear from the NIH team regarding the results of his tests.
We learned a bit more about Stargardt on this trip. There are currently about 25,000 in the U.S. who have it. Scientists believe that light accelerates the vision loss, so it is very important that Ben wears sunglasses any time he is outside or in bright light. So far, he’s complying with that without complaint.
We learned that scientists believe that vitamin A makes Stargardt worse, as opposed to other eye conditions that benefit from high doses of vitamin A (think carrots). So we’re to make sure Ben doesn’t exceed his daily value of vitamin A. That isn’t usually a concern, as this household is not big on carrots … or veggies in general. But I did make pumpkin bars this week and realized I need to think more about what I’m giving him.
He didn’t seem to do well on the color portion of his eye tests. We knew he’d had some difficulty with colors since the onset of Stargardt, but he seemed to struggle more this time than he did on his last test. We’ll check on that when we get our copies of the doctor’s notes.
We were able to see, on the printout of his field of vision test, where his blind spots are. That helped us understand why he is able to see better by turning his head a certain way … his peripheral vision is much better than his central vision, so he adapts by moving his head until the object is visible to him.
Adapting. That’s what we’re doing. I always thought he would take his cues from us, and that we needed to be upbeat and positive. I still want to be upbeat and positive, but I think maybe I’ll start taking some cues from him. He just keeps going, that boy of mine. He doesn’t use his low vision as an excuse. Whatever he wants to do, he tries to do it. I think my job – for now – is to let him, and to find ways to make things easier, if possible.
Done
We’re done! All the tests are done, and the results are pending. This morning, Ben had his MRI spectroscopy. Because of a paperwork glitch, he wasn’t sedated, but he did a great job staying still for the hour and a half or so that it took to do the scan.
After lunch, we were asked to see a genetic counselor back in the National Eye Clinic regarding a protocol they are doing for Stargardt’s Disease. They explained that they are very involved in Stargardt’s research, and asked if we would like to be in their protocol in addition to the neurogenetic protocol that brought us here. That means having Ben tested for the Stargardt’s gene as well as entering him in their network, called eyeGENE. Once in the network, his information will be available to researchers in the U.S. and Canada for their Stargardt’s research, and he will be notified of potential treatments in the future. That is huge! Not only will he be near the front of the line for any treatments that are discovered – they will call us, we won’t have to find out about them years after they’ve been in use – but his data could help researchers know more about the disease and work on discovering those treatments.
His genetic ophthalmologist decided not to do the ERG today, so after some more bloodwork, we headed to the day hospital to have his lumbar puncture done. This was originally to be done while he was sedated, so we were sad that he had to be awake for it. Truly, though, his anxiety was worse than the actual procedure. Once he was calm enough to proceed, he had only slight pain when the doc numbed him, and that was all. He had to stay flat on his back for two hours, so we ordered him some food and let him play DS. When he was released, we got him more ice cream (he’s had a load of that this week) and headed back to the inn, where we ordered pizza and let him play in the game room.
So now we wait for results to come in. The MRI, EEG, and LP results shouldn’t take too long. The genetic tests will take longer. The docs will email us the results and their thoughts behind what the results mean, and how they’d like to proceed.
In other potentially good news, Dr. Bonnemann’s friend Dr. Finkel is going to be head of neuro at the new Nemours Hospital in Orlando, very near our house. We’re hoping that this will open a door for us to have Ben’s steroid treatments done at Nemours. I do love New York, but it would be so much more practical if we could have them done down the road from us.
The days here have been hectic and overwhelming and boring and scary … so I’ve been surprised by how much laughter has been coming from us.
We’ve really enjoyed being together, in spite of the circumstances. What a blessing that has been!
It’s just sinking in, I think, where we are and what we’re doing. I mean, you don’t just walk in to the NIH and have tests done. This place is amazing, the people are wonderful, and they’re on the cutting edge of medical research. I feel confident that, if there is an answer for us, these guys will be the ones who can find it. And if not, I’ll know we did everything in our power to try. Our little man deserves that.
Update
Out on the town
We arrived in DC the day before Ben’s appointments started, so we hopped on the Metro and headed down to see some sights.
First stop was the Washington Monument. Ben brought along Fredward, a bear that was part of his goodie bag when we checked in to the Children’s Inn. Emma was wishing I had packed shorts for her.
This was as close as we could get to the monument. It’s closed for repairs after it was damaged in the earthquake last fall.
Marine One flew over while we were there. I guess the Prez was on his way to cheer on the Hilltoppers in Ohio.
This was the only sign of water we found in the Reflecting Pool. It’s also under renovation.
Honest Abe and me. He’s taller in person.
Viet Nam Wall
My boyfriend at the White House
After waking up at 4:30 a.m., flying in, getting registered, riding the Metro into the city, and walking for hours, Emma still had a bounce in her step and a smile on her face. She’s sure something special. <3
There was quite a crowd at the White House, and what I guess is a privacy screen across the front because of the British Prime Minister’s visit.
First Dog Bo was out chasing a ball
Folks here are downright giddy about the weather. Everyone from the guy at Subway to the cab driver to the doctors … they’re all bragging about the warm and sunny week they’re having. It really is beautiful, and a nice treat to get to experience spring.
NIH
Our appointments at the NIH are underway. I’ve had a bit of anxiety about this visit, but am praying for peace.
This visit has been about 12 years in the making. We’ve seen doctors in Orlando, Miami, and New York, and gotten a wide variety of opinions. From “Clearly you have an autistic child on your hands … There is nothing to do,” to “There’s a chance your son has a fatal neurological disease,” to “He’s just being a boy,” to “It would be nearly impossible to track down which gene is causing his problems,” … we’ve heard just about everything.
All those dead ends have left me skeptical that an answer can be found. That’s where some of my anxiety comes from. Then there’s the fear that the answers may be dire. I just keep going back to the fact that we had given up on an NIH visit when they called us out of the blue and said a different office had reviewed his records and wanted to see him. They have taken wonderful care of us since we arrived. Nothing will be lost by coming here, and since he has greatly benefitted from the steroid protocol in New York over the past two years, the stakes aren’t quite as high as they would have been a couple of years ago.
So I’m trying to go along for the ride and see what happens. If you’re praying for me, that’s what you can pray for: trust and peace. Please also pray for Ben and the doctors, that the docs will have wisdom and insight, and that Ben will be brave.
Room sweet room
It took a while, but Emma’s room is pretty much done. I think all I need to find is a seat for her vanity. Now, I readily acknowledge that I am not creative. That said, with a lot of help from Pinterest, Craigslist, Ikea, and some good ol’ manual labor, we have a room that I really like and that came in under budget.
Jared, Ben, Emma and I put on two coats of primer and two coats of paint to cover the bright orange and red that the walls were to begin with. Canopy and light are courtesy of Ikea. The nightstand was a Craigslist find, along with the dresser and mirror. The beadboard is actually wallpaper from homedepot.com. Thanks for putting it up, Mom!
Dresser, mirror and nightstand from Craigslist (originally Haverty’s) for $100. Yay!
I spray painted a gold mirror white, then added a glaze to antique it. Dad made the vanity, which she uses both as a spot to do her hair and as a desk to do Play Doh and schoolwork. I hung a fold-away towel rack on the wall for her necklaces and bracelets, and covered an oatmeal container to make a headband holder with storage inside for barrettes, etc.
I got Emma some canvases and let her create some artwork to hang above her bed. She’s all about peace signs and butterflies.
I saw this on Pinterest and asked Dad to make one for all Emma’s “friends.” It turned out great! It’s hanging by her bed so she can easily switch out bunkmates.
So there we go. I’m hoping this is a room that will grow with her. I seriously do not like painting.
Now to plan Ben’s room ….
Let us eat cake
Aside
The adventure
Things are shaping up for Ben’s appointment at the NIH. I’ve spoken with the patient care coordinator and gotten an idea what to expect.
The study in which Ben is participating is the Clinical and Molecular Manifestations of Inherited Neurological Disorders. The study is what they call a “natural history study,” meaning the doctors focus on diagnosis, but don’t include interventions or treatment. Doctors have previously decided that Ben has an undiagnosed genetic disorder. Because uncommon genetic disorders are very difficult to diagnose, we have had to experiment to find an effective treatment for him, and we don’t know what to expect in his future. We certainly didn’t see the loss of vision coming.
This study includes patients who, like Ben, have an undiagnosed genetic disorder that affects the neurology of the patient. Dr. Carsten Bonnemann will direct the three days of studies. The first day will consist of meeting with the team to go over Ben’s history, and a PT evaluation. On day two, he will have a sleep-deprived EEG and an electromyogram (EMG). On day three, he is scheduled for sedation so they can do an MRI, a lumbar puncture, and an examination of his retinas. These are the tentative appointments – they may add or subtract tests as they see fit as we go along.
When I explained to Ben that he had been accepted into the study, and what it would entail, he said, with much enthusiasm, “I’ll feel like an alien being probed by scientists!” No White Coat Syndrome here! I do ask for your prayers for him, as some of this will certainly be unpleasant for him.
The NIH is covering three of our four plane tickets, all the tests involved, and our accommodations at The Children’s Inn … which looks like a fun place! I’ve been told it is right on campus, across from the buildings where Ben’s appointments will be, so we won’t need transportation. We feel very blessed. Our prayer is that, at some point, we will know what it is that Ben has. Perhaps that would lead us to treatments. Maybe not. At the least, we hope to know what to expect down the road.
Speaking of treatments, the “experimental” steroid therapy continues to make a huge difference. Praise God! I keep saying that Ben has had the best year of his life since he had that first treatment in January 2011. I am so thankful that he is able to partake of life and enjoy it in his own way. What a difference!
Some of you may have seen my post on Facebook, that we aren’t able to get tickets to tour the White House, the Archives, or the Bureau of Engraving. I’d really hoped to get inside those three, but we’re going to be there at a busy time of year, so all the tickets are already taken. I still hope to see the White House exterior (we were there once when Ben was 9 months old), as well as Ford’s Theater, the Museum of American History, and the Holocaust Museum (we’re finishing up Corrie Ten Boom’s The Hiding Place in school). We fly in the day before his appointments begin, so I’m hoping we’ll have time to explore that afternoon. We fly out late the day after his last appointment, so I’m hoping we’ll have more time for fun that day. We’ve got to cram in some adventure whenever we can!
You see, I was thinking back to the first few weeks after Ben lost his vision. He was struggling with schoolwork one day, and he said to me something like, “I don’t want to be legally blind. Why did God let this happen?” I didn’t know how to answer him. I was honest with him, saying that I didn’t know. “But,” I added, “we’re going to make it an adventure.” He asked me how we would do that, and I honestly answered again that I didn’t know, but that we would. And we are.
Weekend fun
Last weekend, Jared and Emma went to the city’s Father-Daughter Dance. Emma was so excited. She loves her daddy, and she loves to dance! Oh, and she loves any excuse to dress up. The dance was sold out, which we thought was wonderful. There were lots of dads and daughters there doing the YMCA, snacking on candy and cupcakes, and making memories.

I had a wonderful weekend, myself. A dear, longtime (not old!) friend came to visit for a few days. We shopped, ate at Cheesecake Factory, laughed, ran a 5K with a fun group of friends, ate Cinnastacks at IHOP, laughed, went to the beach, ate at Crabby Bills, laughed … I truly treasure my time with her.













































